Traveling Raconteur

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Wishes for Self

I love birthdays and New Years Eve as they seem to give hope for a new start. Atleast 27 birthdays have passed and an equal number of ‘new years’ but none have really brought about any massive change to my reality, no resolution stuck forever or at least a few weeks and yet I make my resolutions for this year with my 28th birthday.

What is it about ourselves that makes us want to believe that we will succeed this time despite many epic fails? This I do not understand.

Every birthday, I have wanted to lose weight, kick old habits, make way for new ones, nurture new talents, and live a more enjoyable life. Some of these happened and some didn’t but never did anything happen with my effort.

I think this birthday I want to change that. It is possible to change things, change one’s way of life to a more desirable one with one’s effort. For this, one must want their ‘want’ very badly and genuinely. I will test how badly I want to see myself change while hoping that I really do change. It is a strange case where everything seems to be in my hands and I am the architect of my life when ironically, nothing in life ever was in my hands, it was always destiny or the power of a force I cannot describe.

This year, I have been very much in love with the idea of bicycling. I once bough a bicycle but failed because I couldn’t figure out the gears. I never touched a bicycle again until in Pondy one morning, a friend coaxed me into trying to get on an old school bike with no gears, the simple, sturdy, rustic bike that people of all ages in Pondicherry glide on effortlessly. With half a heart, I got on the bike and peddled, within minutes I was enjoying myself going round and round the French town’s wide, green lanes, smiling as the sun smiled on me and my scarf flew – what enjoyable ten minutes those were.

I want to buy myself a Hero Jet Lady and with it, discover the pleasure of cycling. How far this will come, I do not know.

Also this year, I hope to

– have more tea, which means, savouring a beverage peacefully and treating the body to a wonderful, tasty, warm detox.

– go organic, use only organic products for my body and hair because when I actually thought about it, the idea of chemicals on my body just didn’t make sense.

– stretch every morning, it makes me feel alive, my muscles seem to enjoy the therapy – doesn’t really mean weight loss but it is pleasure of a different kind.

– speak less but speak kindly, for when I tried, it seemed to heal a heart

– smile sadly (as the Buddhists say)  “acknowledging the sadness and weight of the suffering and confusion of this world, and at the same time appreciating the elegance, joy, compassion and fun that is our human birthright” -> remembering the truth of that line is important.

– enjoy the gift of imagination, I could be in London any moment I want

– enjoy silence

Not a difficult list, just impossible if the mind is not right. It’s important to take care and see that the mind is right.

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This entry was posted on November 4, 2013 by in Everyday Stories.

Fighting An Additction

Not One MoreSeptember 12th, 2014
Addiction is a curse one allows upon one's self until it ceases to seek permission. I do not like the idea of a mind controlled by substance. If I can refrain for 30 days, I'd be very impressed with myself.

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